To Fathers who Adopt Kids with Special Needs
Copyright 2018 Brian Davis - CC-BY-NC-SA
I wrote this in response to a dad who was considering adopting a child with special needs. If I could send a note to younger me this is something I'd say.
I think it's surprising how quickly families and children adapt to disabilities. The best impact will be that for your family, people with AMC will not be "others" they will be part of "us". Which is beautiful.
There will be activities that will look different, and some that you won't be able to participate in but I think you'll find those impacts relatively minor compared to the changes that special needs adoption effect on your hearts.
Your adopted child may struggle with physical disabilities, maybe with emotional trauma, maybe with things you'll have no clue about going in. That's the hard part. To be blunt: you are taking a broken person into your family. You will all share that brokenness. But through it we're teaching our kids that sharing each other's burdens is what family is all about. That love has a cost and it's worth paying. Those are the lessons I hope they take with them when they go out into the world.